Category: Adult Adoptee Support Group

Adoptees Connect- Lexington, KY

Published on by Pamela A. Karanova4 Comments

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Finally I’m putting my long time dream and vision into action and I’m starting a Adoptee Support Group in MY CITY!

This is seriously a long time coming.

I remember back in 2012 when I first started my recovery journey I put a few posts up online seeking other adoptees in my area who wanted to start a support group. I searched the internet HIGH & LOW for one already established.

N O T H I N G

What I did find was Celebrate Recovery which was a wonderful tool in many ways. I started this ministry and received some healing and I came to terms with abandonment & rejection being the root cause of my issues. I shared my testimony many times. I was able to receive Leadership Training and be the Women’s Chemical Dependency Group Leader for close to 4 years. This training I received in this ministry was priceless. I grew in so many ways.

ADOPTEES ARE THE EXPERTS IN ADOPTION.

Over my lifetime I’ve been disappointed over and over at the lack of knowledge in the professional communities such as therapists and psychiatrists regarding all the complexities adoption causes for the adoptee. Some “adoption experts” understand some of the dynamics but it’s geared more towards what the adoptive parents experience than the adoptee. They seem to be clueless of the real truth of all the dynamics of what adoptees live with. Most of the time I feel like I’m theryping the therapist and it’s emotionally and mentally exhausting, especially when we are supposed to be the ones to get help.

Over the years, I did find a few “ADOPTION SUPPORT” groups in the area where members of the triad were present. The only issue with this for me is, this is not considered a safe space for adoptees in my opinion. For many of us, our entire lives adoptees have been told how to feel from others in the triad. We should be “thankful” and “grateful” and happy go lucky adoptees who only share happy stories. With this happening all around it’s a form of gas lighting and it’s done great damage to adoptees all over the world.

Including Me.

Adoptees need there own safe space. Our stories are important and we are important. We deserve to have our own community who can support us, encourage us, and even listen to us when we cry. It’s CRITICAL to our lives and healing that we have our own safe space. Community with those who understand is essential to our journeys.

My hope and prayer is that “Adoptees Connect – Lexington, KY” is just the beginning. I have a dream of seeing “Adoptees Connect” be born in every city and every state in the USA. This brings me great hope for adoptees all over the USA who feel alone, isolated and have no where to turn.

IT’S TIME YOU GUYS!

WE NEED OUR OWN SAFE SPACE!

AWESOME NEWS: I already have my first fellow adoptee who is committing to starting his very own “ADOPTEES CONNECT- Lancaster, PA” and I can’t even tell you how excited I am!!! YAY KEVIN! WOO HOO! I’m so excited for Kevin and his community! We’re in this together!

If you’re an adult adoptee interested in starting an “Adoptees Connect” in your city please message me and we can chat! I can share with you the details and send you the logo with your city and state and you can get things started. I’ve purchased the main domain for “Adoptees Connect” so we can share information on how to get the group started, and a LOG of all the groups that are active, and details about them.

2018 is GOING TO BE AWESOME!

Fear has been in the way for YEARS for me! I am not letting FEAR stop me anymore. I don’t have the blue print for this thing, I just know how valuable my adoptee community is online and I desire that in real life in my community as well. There is power in numbers and community with those who GET IT. Meeting my fellow adoptees online and in real life has been a miraculous & magical all mixed together. We all deserve this community and safe space.

If you are an adoptee you have the qualifications to start your own support group in your community. You have more experience than ANYONE and the most valuable experience at that.

Please message me if you are interested but allow a little time for me to get back to you. I’m currently working 2 jobs and have no days off so I respond to messages in the evenings and early mornings. Just be patient with me. I will get back to you ASAP!

Please celebrate with me as “ADOPTEES CONNECT- Lexington, KY” is launching, followed by “ADOPTEES CONNECT- Lancaster, PA” down the road.

Hugs and LOVE to all!

Please Check Out Adoptees Connect- Lexington, KY Here

Adoptees Connect – Lexington, KY Facebook

Find Adoptees Connect – Lexington, KY Twitter

And you can also find us on Instagram @adopteesconnectlexky

XOXO

Pamela Karanova

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How Does It Feel To Be Adopted?

Published on by Pamela A. KaranovaLeave a comment

The reason I’m asking is because I think its important for everyone to know how it feels for an ADULT ADOPTEE to be ADOPTED. I think we can really learn some things from one another, as well as share our insights with the world, adoptive parents, and birth parents, as well as with other adoptees in general.
My interest in this topic is based on a book I recently purchased called “How it feels to be adopted” by Jill Krementz. In her book are many small stories from young adolescent adoptees, or even some children all from ages 8-16. I was enjoying reading this book, but I couldn’t help but wonder what their responses will be later on in life? Will they still feel the same about their adoption experience? I’m sure some will, and some won’t.

I would love for my fellow adoptee friends to help me with this project. I was wondering if you would write a paragraph, how every big you would like, or how ever small you would like on what it feels like to be adopted now that you are an adult?? Would you mind taking a few minutes to do that? I want to post this on my blog, FB “Like” Page, and my twitter so others can understand a little better on HOW IT FEELS TO BE ADOPTED.

If you would respond to this post, that would be great but if you want to remain annonymous please email your response to howdoesitfeeltobeadopted@gmail.com  and put “How it feels to be adopted” in the subject line. Also put “Annonymous” at the end if you want to remain annonymous. If you would like to respond on our “Like” page, here is the link.

     How Does It Feel To Be Adopted
My intentions are not to hurt anyones feelings, but to shed some light on how it feels for an adopted adult to be adopted.

Many Blessings,

If I Could, I Would..

Published on by Pamela A. KaranovaLeave a comment

Don’t you understand.. If I could see my adoption experience as a wonderful thing, I WOULD!

If I could just let go of the pain it has caused me, I WOULD!

If I could just fill the empty hole deep inside me, I WOULD!

If I could just take back my “Adoptee Status”, I WOULD!

If I could learn to bond with other people in a more profound way, I WOULD!

If the fear of rejection would just leave my body, I WOULD BE HAPPIER!

If I could explain how I feel without getting interrupted just one time, I WOULD!

If I could shake you so you understand my pain, I WOULD!

This is not the choice I picked for me, and my life. This wasn’t my choice at all. But now I have a choice what I’m going to do with this mess!

I’m going to help other adoptees, BECAUSE I CAN!

I’m going to learn how to cope with my wounds that are so deep, BECAUSE I CAN!

I’m going to use my God given ADOPTEE VOICE, BECAUSE I CAN!

I’m going to pray EVERYDAY that God help me get through another test, trial, or tribulation!, BECAUSE I CAN!

I will share my view, and opinion on my experience growing up in a closed adoption with other adoptive parents, so maybe they have a little glimpse of what their adopted child is maybe going through, BECAUSE I CAN!

I can understand what other adoptees are feeling, and going through, BECAUSE I AM ONE OF THEM!

Please don’t judge me, or any other adoptee for that matter, if you are not one of us. If you didn’t get torn from your biological roots, which are the very roots that define you as a person then you have no idea what its like to be adopted.

Please don’t judge me as being negative because my adoption experience is not a wonderful one, think about the fact that maybe adoption isn’t as pretty as you have thought it was?? That is possible.

I will continue to share my adoption experience with the world,
Adoptee In Recovery

Adult Adoptee Support Group-Lexington, KY

Published on by Pamela A. KaranovaLeave a comment
I have thought so many times about finding an adoptee support group in my area, but there is none.
This is no good. I have done so much healing just by being in contact with other adoptees online, and via my blog and twitter. What about those that don’t know about those things? What about those that are just as confused as ever with their adoption feelings but they don’t know where to begin with the healing process? Wouldn’t it be amazing to have a place to go to be able to share those things, and meet and fellowship with other adult adoptees? I sure think it would be
If anyone would be interested in participating in a support group for Adult Adoptees in Lexington, KY please email your information to:

adopteeloveforever@gmail.com

Revelation ESV 21:4
“He will wipe away every tear from their eyes, and death shall be no more, neither shall there be mourning, nor crying, nor pain anymore, for the former things have passed away.”